Chips (English Style)
This is a follow-up to my previous post (http://iamfranksbitch.tumblr.com/post/37694320728/sloppy-joes) where I introduced Brits to the American classic, Sloppy Joes. Let’s start off with the most important lesson here. I’m English so “Chips” means Chips, not crisps and not fries. Crisps are what you yankee freaks call chips, we British call chips, chips. In other words, a...
I haven’t written a post for a while and thought I should. I’m supposed to use this space to tell you about living with Frank but for various reasons I will one day go into, I’ve been slacking off. So to make up for it (??) I’m going to share with my UK readers (since US already know this) “Sloppy Joes”. In short it’s just minced beef with every condiment...
lauren ashley bishop lives here: i sent my mom an... →
laurenashleybishop: I want to tell you to not vote for Romney for a lot of reasons. I want to remind you how devastatingly dishonest he’s been regarding his own finances. How he basically committed a felony in 2009 which is why he won’t release his tax returns for that year. How he lied blatantly about the auto…
2012 US Presidential Debate - An Englishman's View
Today I watched, for the first time, the U.S. Presidential debate in full. I’ve seen bits of previous U.S. presidential debates (“the debate”) from the UK as believe it or not, who becomes the President of the United States is a concern to many outside of America, even to non-Americans. I thought I’d give a quick run-down of how I thought it came across to a Non-American,...
I'm a "Libtard", apparently
This actually stemmed from the response to one of Frankie’s facebook statuses and was directed at them but since it applies to me too, I thought I’d take a stab at a response. In the end, I felt it was something I’d like to share with others, as I often do with my opinions. So here then, unedited, is my facebook response: “Libtard”? If you mean belief in the freedom...
Just Call Me Frank: Finally donated to the... →
jstcallmefrank: ..and now we have a chance to bring our Republican Right-Wing NRA-lovin’ Republican father to a dinner with the Democratic President of the United States (if we win, we’re bringing him) - which was apparently part of the donation. So the donation was even better. The day Obama got elected we…
How Do We Prevent Cyber Bullying?
With the recent increase in personal attacks on social media sites such as twitter we’ve become more vocal about what should or shouldn’t be done in an effort to control it and to punish the offenders. In a perfect world there wouldn’t be any need to worry of course because there wouldn’t be despicable cowards that write such hate filled comments. Alas it’s not a perfect world so second best would...
nerdyspice: tessanetting: OMG I CANT BREATHE. I knew it was coming but it was still fuckin hilarious!!
Obama: Doesn't want to ban porn.
Obama: Doesn't want to restrict your internet.
Obama: Doesn't want to take away your guns.
Obama: Supports gay marriage.
Obama: Education for all!
Obama: Universal healthcare!
Obama: Wants to continue Planned Parenthood!
Americans: You're destroying this country.
My Mid-West Whore
Arrived mid west from an English shore, To Amazing Grace with my beautiful whore. Pancakes and eggs, the breakfast this day, Fully replete we go out and play. Seventy one inches tall they stand, Public indecency gets us nearly banned. Hours spent on Interstates driven, Hotels mean sleep and stresses forgiven.
Bears, Pain, Girls and Alcohol; It's A Tweetup
It finally happened, Frankie and I went to a tweetup in Detroit and actually met some our fellow freaks tweeps. The weekend started May 25th in Chicago when we collected, and met for the first time, the bear known as Nick Twist (@Nick_Twist) from O’Hare airport. I ‘met’ Nick on Twitter as he follows Frankie (@JustCallMeFrank) and has done for around a year now. Anyone...
Constitutional Right To Lie
Today, the Supreme court decided that Jim Moats could NOT be prosecuted for lying about receiving a Medal of Honour, despite the FACT that it is AGAINST the Law (see “Stolen Valor Act”). The reason? Because lying is protected by your (citizens of the United States of America) constitutional rights. And this brings us to a quandary. Do I believe the Supreme Court were right? No I...
US Healthcare (ObamaCare) System
[Rant warning - Sometimes if I don’t write things down I forget. This is why I have so many draft posts so this time I’m just going to rant / ramble.] Being English I’m very familiar with a social healthcare system. England has enjoyed ‘free’ healthcare, what we refer to as NHS (National Health Service) since the late forties - early fifties (as has most of Britain)...
Homeless in the UK
Tonight is my (our) last night in my flat. My flat that I’ve owned for 12 years, 3 months and 10 days. The first property I’ve ever owned. The flat sale should have completed months ago but for various fuck ups and morons it took almost 6 months. I’m giving the money from the sale to my ex-wife so the delay isn’t an issue from that point of view and in fact, proved a life...
Getting my Twitter hate on
Still hate Twitter. Think I hate it more now I’m not on it. Frankie of course keeps me updated with what goes on and I hate it more. I hate it as an application. The Twitter developers, rather pretentiously(?) referred to as “engineers” by Twitter support, are, in short, useless fucking ignorant cunts. How you can develop such a crock of shit and not get fired is beyond me. All I can think is that...
Getting Rid Of Twitter
I tried to do this a month or so ago but was … encouraged to come back. I wasn’t happy about it and I’m sure it didn’t go un-noticed that I wasn’t happy about it. I’d close the account properly if it wasn’t for the fact it’s how I met Frankie; that is the sole reason I’ll leave it as is. I don’t normally justify myself, I sure as fuck...
A Request To Twitter Re Blocking Features
[This is a copy of an email I sent to twitter regarding the (currently) useless block feature and how I feel they need to better protect their users from harassment and bullying] As twitter has grown and the users have multiplied so greatly, we now, more than ever need a better block feature. Every day I see tweets about how people are being harassed / bullied by despicable, hateful people and...
Earn Your Place You Cunt
I was recently asked by the very lovely @Serenity_X to do an audioboo (the first person to ask me to do one, which was nice…) where I discuss why people are placed onto my “worthless cunts” twitter list. It’s a list where I add those from twitter that I feel are literally, worthless cunts. What seems to upset the people on the list is that have no idea why they are on the...
Social Media circa 1775
It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, - Charles Dickens - A Tale of Two Cities You know what I immediately thought of when I read this?...
Tom Foolery™ has landed!: Dear America →
tom-fool3ry: To the citizens of the United States of America from Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II: In light of your immediate failure to financially manage yourselves and also in recent years your tendency to elect incompetent Presidents of the USA and therefore not able to govern yourselves, we…
Message to Fuck Face
I don’t actually like the FF reference for this, I’d rather use your name so please know that when I write this, it’s your name that I am saying in my head, I hope you get the implication (respect) of that. FF, you’re an idiot. For so many fucking reasons. I do think you have been a cunt to them on occasion, enough of one that at times I could easily...
Why I'm Not On Twitter Lately
I’m taking a bit of a sabbatical from Twitter. I think it started when I saw “that” tweet. I already blogged about it or tumblr’d it so you can read more there but in short, … [delete delete] you know, I don’t want to go over it again. Prior to that I was getting pissed off with all the fucking dumb cunts asking Franky dumb stupid fucking questions that upset...
Funny, I look at your “weaknesses” and all I read was a list of star qualities for twitter! fuckwittery: Today I’ve been doing a psychometric test as part of a management training course. I had to fill in a questionnaire where you rate yourself in different situations - where you think your strengths and weaknesses are as well as rating 0-5 in other things. It’s difficult to explain...
They Fuck You Up
Just a poem I like, “This Be The Verse” by Philip Larkin They fuck you up, your Mum and Dad. They may not mean to, but they do. They fill you with the faults they had, And add some extra, just for you. But they were fucked up in their turn By fools in old-style hats and coats, Who half the time were soppy-stern And half the time at one another’s throats. Man hands on misery to...
Just Call Me Frank: Grab Life By The Throat... →
jstcallmefrank: Our boyfriend was just telling us a story about how when he was younger his dog had a rabbit in it’s mouth, just loosely holding it there…and he stood and stared at the dog, and then charged towards it (trying to save the rabbit), and as he did the dog clamped down and ate the rabbit…and then… Love you baby. xo
Just Call Me Frank: Why Our Twitter Account Name... →
jstcallmefrank: We get a lot of people asking… “Shouldn’t your account be called @JustCallUsFrank?” or why isn’t it. If you read our blog you know that the one of us to start the blog, and this account (The Other Girl, our core, who no longer exists) did so trying to hide who she was, and who we were. Once she…
Serenity, thank you so much for your sweet words. Though we both sit “here” now with tears in our eyes. Thank you. fuckwittery: Blogs seem to be the ‘in’ thing at the moment and lots of people have them for different reasons. I have another one which is for my own gratification (my personal wank bank) but I felt that I wanted one that was more open (not just porn) so I created this...